thanks

Thanks to all who sent encouraging emails. I really needed to know I still had people out there. Friends. Persons who see me as I am and not what I am lacking. For me they are huge neon signs, but I thank God He lets you see me for me and love me when I cannot.

Things were crazy at the final liquidation sale. If you ever have the opportunity to work one, don't. It was not fun and very stressful. However, the high point is, it'll be good experience, I hope. Anywho, I am officially without a job. I have no real line on another job. I am in school online, now. I'm wrapping up loose ends from c-ville with at least an associate's degree. It's something. I'm talking to several people, trying to get some answers. I've reached out to the International Childbirth Educators Association trying to get a feel for job prospects should I go that route. I still think I'll need my RN. Which does disappoint me b/c this school year I cannot commit that kind of time. I just can't or won't. Either way, it's not happening. Next year, K will be in all day Kindergarten! (which I cannot believe! sidenote: she's got a loose tooth!!!!! i'm not ready for that yet, she isn't old enough! sheesh!) Michael will hopefully have an administration job and at least his rank one pay increase. That means I won't have to work and go to school and I won't feel guilty for missing out on K still being home. In the mean time, I've been thinking I could get certified through ICEA for lactation consulting and childbirth educating. However, I do not have that kind of money. So if I could get somewhere to hire me as is and then pay for the certifications that would be great. unlikely.

I've decided to at least volunteer with the local pregnancy crisis center. i made a great connection with a girl who worked at dawahare's. she a senior in high school. has a 6 mo. she really opened up to me and it really made me see I have something to offer others in her situation. even if i can't get paid to do it. It's important to me and I should do it for that reason alone.

Lots of thoughts. Not much sense, but thanks for reading anyways. You are all so special to me. Thank you for still being my friends even if I can't see you or talk to you. Your written words were so special.

Love ya!!